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Skip to content HomeLandasan AgamaFikih dan MuamalahNasihat HatiNasihat UlamaSejarah IslamHomeLandasan AgamaFikih dan MuamalahNasihat HatiNasihat UlamaSejarah IslamHomeLandasan AgamaFikih dan MuamalahNasihat HatiNasihat UlamaSejarah Islam KEBAIKAN AGAMA SESEORANG BISA DILIHAT DARI TEMANNYA KEBAIKAN AGAMA SESEORANG BISA DILIHAT DARI TEMANNYA بِسْمِ اللَّهِ الرَّحْمَنِ الرَّحِيمِ MutiaraSunnah KEBAIKAN AGAMA SESEORANG BISA DILIHAT DARI TEMANNYA Rasulullah ﷺ menjadikan teman sebagai patokan terhadap baik dan buruknya agama seseorang. Oleh sebab itu Rasulullah ﷺ memerintahkan kepada kita agar memilih teman dalam bergaul. Dalam sebuah hadis, Rasulullah ﷺ bersabda المرء على دين خليله فلينظر أحدكم من يخالل “Agama seseorang tergantung dengan agama teman dekatnya. Hendaklah kalian memerhatikan, siapa yang dia jadikan teman dekatnya.” HR. Abu Daud dan Tirmidzi, dishahihkan oleh Syaikh Al Albani dalam Silsilah Ash-Shahihah, no. 927 Sudah dapat dipastikan, bahwa seorang teman memiliki pengaruh yang sangat besar terhadap temannya. Teman bisa memengaruhi agama, pandangan hidup, kebiasaan dan sifat-sifat seseorang. Dengan demikian, pesan Rasulullah ﷺ dalam hadis di atas hendaknya selalu menjadi pertimbangan kita dalam memilih seseorang untuk menjadi teman dekat kita, entah itu sebagai istri, suami, tetangga, guru, teman bekerja atau selainnya. Abdullah bin Mas’ud radhiallahu anhu berkata “Hendaknya kalian menilai orang dengan teman dekatnya. Karena seorang Muslim akan mengikuti orang yang Muslim, sementara orang jahat akan mengikuti orang yang jahat pula.” Al-Mu’jam Al-Kabir no. 8919, Al-Ibanah 502 Abdullah bin Mas’ud radhiallahu anhu juga berkata “Orang yang dapat berjalan bersama dan berteman, adalah orang yang disuka dan yang sejenis.” Al-Ibanah, 499 Abud Darda’ radhiallahu anhu berkata “Di antara bentuk kecerdasan seseorang adalah selektif dalam memilih teman berjalan, teman bersama, dan teman duduknya.” Al-Ibanah, 379 Syaikh Abdul Muhsin Al-Qasim [beliau adalah imam Masjid Nabawi dan hakim di Mahkamah Syariah Madinah] berkata “Sifat manusia adalah cepat terpengaruh dengan teman pergaulannya”. Bahkan manusia bisa terpengaruh dengan seekor binatang ternak. Rasulullah ﷺ bersabda الْفَخْرُ وَالْخُيَلاَءُ فِي الْفَدَّادِينَ أَهْلِ الْوَبَرِ وَالسَّكِينَةُ فِي أَهْلِ الْغَنَمِ Kesombongan dan keangkuhan terdapat pada orang-orang yang meninggikan suara di kalangan pengembala unta. Dan ketenangan terdapat pada pengembala kambing [HR. al-Bukhari no. 3499 dan Muslim no. 187] Nabi ﷺ mengabarkan, bahwa menggembalakan unta akan berpengaruh terhadap timbulnya kesombongan dan keangkuhan. Dan menggembalakan kambing berpengaruh akan timbulnya sifat ketenangan. Jika dengan hewan, makhluk yang tidak berakal dan kita tidak tahu apa maksud dari suara yang dikeluarkannya, manusia bisa saja terpengaruh, maka bagaimana pendapat kita dengan orang yang bisa bicara dengan kita, paham perkataan kita, bahkan terkadang membohongi dan mengajak kita untuk memenuhi hawa nafsunya serta memerdayai kita dengan syahwat? Bukankan orang itu akan lebih berpengaruh? [Khuthuwat ila as-Sa’adah hlm. 141] Di tengah masyarakat, jika kita tidak memilih teman yang baik, maka kita tinggal memilih Apakah kita yang akan memengaruhi orang-orang untuk menjadi lebih baik? Ataukah kita yang menjadi korban pengaruh buruk lingkungan kawan-kawan? Ingat! Tidak ada pilihan yang ketiga. Sumber Related Posts

Ilustrasi mendukung teman yang sedang berduka. Foto Shutter StockPertemanan adalah perkara muamalah yang turut dibahas dalam kajian Islam. Terdapat sejumlah ayat dan hadits yang menjelaskan tentang keutamaan pertemanan lengkap dengan kiat Swt menghendaki hamba-Nya berteman dengan landasan iman dan takwa. Hal tersebut sangat utama, karena bisa membawa seseorang kepada jalan yang benar dan sebaliknya. Dalam sebuah hadits, Rasulullah SAW bersabda"Seseorang tergantung pada agama teman dekatnya, maka hendaklah salah seorang dari kalian melihat siapa yang dia jadikan sebagai teman dekat."Secara tersirat, hadits tersebut menganjurkan setiap Muslim untuk selektif dalam memilih teman. Tidak diperkenankan baginya untuk berteman dekat dengan seseorang yang jauh dari ajaran Allah dengan kiat-kiat lainnya dalam memilih teman? Nah, berikut kumpulan hadits tentang memilih teman yang bisa Anda jadikan tentang Memilih TemanIlustrasi traveling bareng teman Foto Shutter stockPengaruh teman dapat menentukan karakter dan pemahaman agama seseorang. Dalam buku 99 Hadits Pilihan untuk Anak, disebutkan sebuah hadits Rasulullah yang berbunyi“Perumpamaan teman yang baik dan yang jahat adalah seperti orang yang membawa minyak wangi dan tukang pandai besi. Yang membawa minyak wangi, boleh jadi dia memberimu, atau kamu membeli daripadanya, atau paling tidak kamu mendapatkan harum semerbak daripadanya. Adapun tukang pandai besi, boleh jadi bajumu terbakar karenanya, atau kamu mendapatkan bau busuk daripadanya." HR Al-Bukhari dan MuslimSecara tersirat, hadits tersebut menjelaskan tentang arti pertemanan bagi seseorang. Jika berteman dengan orang baik, seorang Muslim bisa menjadi baik. Namun, jika berteman dengan orang yang buruk, ia pun bisa ikut buku Aku Sudah Gede Ngobrolin Pubertas Buat Remaja Islam, dari Ibnu Asakir, Rasullah SAW bersabda "Hati-hati dengan teman yang jahat, karena sesungguhnya dengan kawan itu keadaanmu akan diketahui.”Hadits tersebut mengingatkan umat Islam untuk berhati-hati dalam memilih teman. Karena teman bisa mempengaruhi sikap dan perilaku jalan-jalan bersama teman ke pantai Foto ShutterstockJangan sampai salah dalam memilih dan mengakibatkan penyesalan berkepanjangan. Dalam surat al-Furqan ayat 27-29 Allah Swt berfirman"Dan ingatlah hari ketika itu orang yang zhalim menggigit dua tangannya, seraya berkata, 'Aduhai kiranya dulu aku mengambil jalan bersama-sama Rasul. Kecelakaan besarlah bagiku; kiranya aku dulu tidak menjadikan si fulan itu teman akrabku. Sesungguhnya dia telah menyesatkan aku dari Al-Qur'an ketika Al-Qur'an itu telah datang kepadaku. Dan setan memang pengkhianat manusia.”Adapun kriteria teman yang baik dalam Islam telah dijelaskan Ibnu Qudamah melalui kitabnya. Mengutip Mukhtasar Minhajul Qashidin, beliau berkataوفى جملة، فينبغى أن يكون فيمن تؤثر صحبته خمس خصال أن يكون عاقلاً حسن الخلق غير فاسق ولا مبتدع ولا حريص على الدنيا“Secara umum, hendaknya orang yang engkau pilih menjadi sahabat memiliki lima sifat berikut orang yang berakal, memiliki akhlak yang baik, bukan orang fasik, bukan ahli bid’ah, dan bukan orang yang rakus dengan dunia”Bagaimana pertemanan yang dihendaki Allah Swt?Bagaimana bunyi hadits tentang memilih teman?Bagaimana kriteria teman yang baik dalam Islam?

Makahendaklah salah seorang dari kamu memperhatikan dengan siapa ia berteman" (HR. Tirmidzi). Dua dalil tersebut cukup kiranya menjadi dasar untuk berhati-hati dalam memilih teman. Karena sangat dimungkinkan seseorang terpengaruh oleh akhlak dari teman dekatnya.

Seseorang tergantung pada agama teman dekatnya, maka hendaklah salah seorang dari kalian melihat siapa yang dia jadikan sebagai teman dekat." Secara tersirat, hadits tersebut menganjurkan setiap Muslim untuk selektif dalam memilih teman. Tidak diperkenankan baginya untuk berteman dekat dengan seseorang yang jauh dari ajaran Allah SWT.

Do you feel that someone you have a friendly relationship with is trying to cut ties? There are some specific things that happen when friends distance themselves from you. All it takes is to recognize these behaviors. No one likes to feel unwelcome, neglected, or left out by their friends. But at the same time, it’s easy to misinterpret other people’s behaviors. To make sure you have a clear idea about what’s happening in your friendship, check the signs below. What Happens When Friends Distance Themselves from You?1. They don’t seem interested in spending time together2. They turn down your invitations3. When you meet, they try to dodge the conversation4. They show no interest in your life5. They don’t share anything personal with you anymore6. They give you excuses7. They don’t want you to be a part of their lifeWhat to Do When Friends Distance Themselves from You?1. Make sure it’s not a made-up situation2. Analyze your behavior3. Talk to them4. Let them go 1. They don’t seem interested in spending time together In the modern age and world, it’s easy to get too busy to find time for social activities. But you can always tell a friend who is just buried in responsibilities from someone who doesn’t want to see you. The difference is that a real friend will show interest and willingness to be a part of your life, no matter how busy they are. Yes, they may turn down your invitations from time to time or cancel some activities you planned together. But they will be willing to arrange something new and interested to know how you are doing. A friend who is trying to keep their distance won’t seem interested in maintaining any contact with you. Instead of using every opportunity to see you and find a free minute to talk to you, they will just disappear from your life for long periods of time. 2. They turn down your invitations Maybe you get sad because your friend doesn’t invite you anywhere anymore. It could be that they are too busy at work or are going through a hard time in life. So you decide to take the lead and invite them instead. But even when you offer them something to do together, they ignore it or give you some kind of excuse. If it happens on a regular basis, then they simply don’t want to spend time with you. This is what happens when your friend distances themselves from you. 3. When you meet, they try to dodge the conversation You may stumble upon your friend at a social event or somewhere outside. But when it happens, they don’t look very excited about seeing you. You can tell it from their facial expression and overall attitude. For example, they might make little eye contact and exhibit closed body language cues such as crossed arms or turning away from you. Your friend may look tense, bored, or uncomfortable in general. They will barely ask you any questions and the conversation will probably center around small talk topics. But the most surefire sign that your friend is trying to distance themselves from you is that they will make attempts to escape the conversation. They will give you one-word answers or shift their attention onto someone else at the social gathering in order to stop talking to you. 4. They show no interest in your life As we said above, a busy friend will still show interest in you and your life. Someone who wants to stay away from you won’t do this. Whether you want to share a personal problem with a friend or just tell them about your news, they won’t look interested. Their responses will be short and indifferent and the conversation just won’t flow. It may be quite disappointing to see such a difference in your friend’s behavior, especially if you used to talk about everything. But a lack of interest is a huge sign someone no longer wants to be your friend. 5. They don’t share anything personal with you anymore Another frustrating sign that your friendship is fading is that someone no longer shares personal things with you. You used to tell them about your most intimate problems, and so did your friend. But they no longer do. Your conversations have shifted to small talk topics and day-to-day happenings. It means that they no longer consider you to be a person they could confide in. It doesn’t always happen on purpose – sometimes it’s the life that distances us from other people. For example, you may have moved to a different city, and it’s difficult to maintain the same level of emotional intimacy in a long-distance friendship. Maybe your friend started a family and you no longer have common interests and topics to talk about. 6. They give you excuses If you want to spend time with your friend, you may be the one to offer them things to do. But they always seem to have a good excuse to give, even when you invite them to your birthday party. For example, your friend used to invite you to social gatherings and offer to spend time together regularly. Now he barely returns your calls. Whenever you try to reach him out and suggest an activity or event, he says he is busy or has family issues. Yes, this may happen once, twice, or even a few times. But if your friend sticks with giving you excuses for not showing up after multiple invitations from your side, then they are most likely intentionally distancing themselves from you. 7. They don’t want you to be a part of their life Finally, a key thing that happens when friends distance themselves from you is that they don’t care to let you know about important changes and events in their lives. For example, your friend didn’t tell you about her engagement and you learned it from a Facebook post or your common acquaintance. It could also be that your college buddy didn’t invite you to his birthday party. All these situations leave you feeling excluded and ignored, but they reveal a lot about your friend’s real attitude. Most likely, they just no longer want you to be a part of their life. What to Do When Friends Distance Themselves from You? If you recognize your situation in the signs above, you may want to know what to do next. 1. Make sure it’s not a made-up situation As we said, people don’t always make a conscious decision to distance themselves from you. So the first step is to make sure that your friend is indeed not interested in maintaining contact with you. If they turned down your invitation a couple of times, then probably it’s too soon to draw conclusions. In this case, look for other indicators such as a lack of interest and desire to talk to you. If you are sure that they are trying to stay away from you, then decide for yourself whether this friendship means a lot for you. Do you want to continue to be their friend? Do you believe that you two have a genuine connection that should not be wasted? 2. Analyze your behavior When friends distance themselves from you, there could indeed be reasons for that. They could find some of your behaviors annoying or be bothered with something you recently did. For example, if you are too pushy or intrusive with your quiet friend, they may find your behavior too overwhelming. They may finally decide to cut ties. Maybe you talk about yourself all the time and don’t show interest in the other person. What if your friend is facing adversity and you offer them no support? It could also be that you are too negative and complain a lot. There are multiple examples of annoying behaviors that push people away. Sometimes we wonder why we lose friends because we don’t even realize that the things we do or say bother other people. 3. Talk to them If you really value this friendship, talking to the other person would be a good idea. But make sure to not sound demanding or angry. You don’t want to call them out; you just want to make sense of your friend’s behavior. Expressing your concerns in an open and calm manner will help you avoid misunderstandings. Maybe your friend is having a hard time at work and is not in a mood for social activities. It could be that he is indeed annoyed by some of your behaviors. Finally, they could feel like you no longer resonate together and they have a better time in other people’s company. Having an honest talk with your friend will help you figure it all out and realize whether your fading friendship can be saved. 4. Let them go Sometimes friends don’t distance themselves from you intentionally. It just happens. The person who was your best friend in college is no longer the same easy-going guy. He now has a family to support and a business to run. He is overwhelmed with obligations. People change, life circumstances change, and it doesn’t always have to do with us. Sometimes people just drift apart. It’s sad and disappointing, but it happens a lot in life – not only in friendly connections but also in romantic and family unions. So ask yourself if you are genuinely interested in maintaining this friendship. What if it has become more of a social obligation? Do you gain things from each other emotionally and intellectually? A fading friendship could be a natural consequence of a change in your or the other person’s life. Maybe you are no longer the right company for your friend, and neither are they for you. Perhaps they have already realized it and so they are trying to cut ties. In this case, the best solution would be to let them go. Be grateful for the great time you used to have together and move on with your life. After all, not all friendships are meant to last for a lifetime, and it’s fine. Did you find this post useful? 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seseorang tergantung teman dekatnya